The 10-second career guide
At the risk of turning this blog into a vapid regurgitation of things my friends post on Facebook, I can’t resist posting these hilarious 10-second career snapshots. Don’t see your job listed? Don’t worry. More are being added every day.
And remember: It’s never too late to switch careers!
Filed under: Attempted humor, Friends and family, Technology | 10 Comments
Tags: Facebook, humor, know your meme, What I Really Do, What People Think I Do
I had mixed feelings about joining Facebook.
I am by nature a very private person, and I cringed at the thought of broadcasting my every move. Yet as old friends scattered all over the planet—and as I made new friends through my own travels—Facebook seemed like the best way to stay in touch.
I quickly learned just how compelling this online community can be. Over the past two years, I’ve followed my former colleague Max as he’s photographed his way through Egypt and Iraq. I’ve tagged along vicariously as another moved to Bulgaria and became a teacher. I’ve reconnected with old neighbors and classmates, and I’ve made some new online friends.
But of all the things I’ve grown to appreciate about Facebook, the endless stream of laughs is near the top of my list. Here’s a random collection of things that brought a chuckle over the past two weeks. I hope they start your day on a happy note, too.
… and to continue with our maritime disaster theme:
This one wins the “Most Ironic Tattoo” award:
I think this one applies to sleeping with babies, too …
… and last, but certainly not least, a tribute to beer, bratwurst, and bellies.
Filed under: Attempted humor, Friends and family, Psychology, Travel | 11 Comments
Tags: Facebook, Max Becherer, Paris
A whole lotta whore frost
Once every couple of years, the meteorological conditions in Minneapolis coalesce to produce hoarfrost. Although most Minnesotans—including at least one newspaper employee—misspell it as “whore frost,” it has nothing to do with the ladies of the night.
Hoarfrost happens when the air is warm and relatively humid, and then the temperature drops below freezing. As the temperature falls, the moisture in the air freezes into large ice crystals that stick to trees, buildings … pretty much everything. The result looks like this:
Yesterday I awoke to a wintry wonderland of grays and whites, so I set out for a morning photo drive.
Although the frost was beautiful, the thick clouds made the light dull and flat. I chatted with a photographer named Chuck and played with his dogs while I waited for the skies to brighten.
Alas, nature had other plans: The light stayed a dull gray all day. But at least I got in a good walk.
As I sorted through my photos tonight, I wondered whether I’ll still be living in Minnesota when the next hoarfrost strikes. It’s one of the many beautiful things I’ll miss about this place.
Filed under: Minnesota, Photography | 14 Comments
Tags: hoarfrost, Minneapolis, Minnesota, Photography, winter
If Mozart had eaten more veggies, partied less, and gotten a bit of exercise, today he might be celebrating his 256th birthday.
Photo via singforyoursupperblog.com
I was made aware of this fact last Saturday during A Prairie Home Companion, when Garrison Keillor and pianist Rich Dworsky teamed up for a lovely-yet-cheeky tribute to Herr Mozart.
Mozart has been a constant throughout my life. As a kid, I mirthlessly mangled his piano sonatas (much to my family’s distress). And as a teen, I backpacked through Mozart’s old haunts in Salzburg and Vienna.
But it wasn’t until 1984 that I developed a true appreciation for Mozart’s music—and for the man. That was the year Jan (Milos) Forman’s film Amadeus hit the screen.
I remember slumping limply in my chair as the closing credits scrolled, and sitting motionless until the theater’s house lights came on. I couldn’t believe that such a brilliant composer—such an extraordinary human being—could die penniless at 35 and be dumped like trash into a communal grave.
The film awakened in me a fascination for Mozart’s enigmatic nature: a rebel, a romantic, a prankster, a gifted teacher, a devoted son, a prodigy and a spendthrift … all of these coexisted inside one complicated (and oft-misunderstood) man.
I’ve watched Amadeus several times since that first screening, and each time my appreciation for the film has deepened. But now my reaction to the ending is different: Mozart isn’t dead. He’s immortal.
Happy 256th birthday, Wolfie.
Post script: No offense to F. Murray Abraham, but I still think Tom Hulce should have won the Oscar for his beautifully nuanced performance. You rocked me, Amadeus!
Filed under: Attempted humor, Music, On this day in history | 12 Comments
Tags: Amadeus, f murray abraham, film amadeus, herr mozart, Milos Forman, Mozart birthday, piano sonatas, Tom Hulce
Burning down the house
As I get older, milestones become more important. Some of them—like birthdays—mark the passage of time. Others make me think about the future.
Today is one of the latter. On this day two years ago, I was told I have a brain tumor.
I’ve tried very hard not to let it be the thing that defines me, the thing that shapes my life. But the knowledge has changed me irrevocably.
In some ways, it’s been a gift: A little whiff of mortality can be a powerful aphrodisiac. Everything seems more meaningful and more poignant. Seeing what might kill me has made me feel more alive.
But in other ways, it’s been paralyzing. I’ve put off making some plans for the future. Every decision has come with a quiet but insistent bass line: “What if, what if, what if?”
I hadn’t realized until a few days ago just how much I’d surrendered to my fears.
The first wake-up call came via Skype. “I wish I could live in Europe, if only for a while,” I told my friend Jan. “So why don’t you burn your house and come over?” he replied.
The second wake-up call came over sushi. “I want to travel more and spend more time taking photos,” I told my friend Todd. “Sometimes you’ve gotta burn down the house and just go,” he replied.
And the third wake-up call came over the weekend, as I was trying to distract myself from a crippling headache.
“What if 2012 were your last year, your last chance at leaving your mark or doing something great or crossing out every item on your bucket list?” began the post at Olivier Blanchard’s BrandBuilder blog.
This has nothing to do with the Mayan calendar or the financial crisis, mind you. It’s just a simple what if question.
What if you went another year without writing that book you’ve been thinking about for a decade? What if you went another year without taking that trip to Paris or Moscow or Sydney you’ve been dreaming about your whole life? What if you went another year waiting to launch your startup? …
Here’s what I’ve learned in the last few years: There’s no such thing as the right time. All we really ever have is now. Now is the right time. Tomorrow is bullshit. Tomorrow turns into next year and then someday and finally never. Tomorrow and next year will be too late. Whatever needs doing, do it now. Today.
Early in my career, I wasted years – precious years – doing what I was told, trying to fit in and often playing it safe when every instinct in my body told me not to. You have no idea how much I now regret having thrown those years away. I lost so much time waiting for opportunities and “the right time” to do something, it makes me ill just thinking about it. Never again.
So the lesson here is simply this: Ask her out. Book that flight. Graduate. Take the job. Write the damn book. Get your funding. Finish that triathlon. Launch your startup. Carpe Diem isn’t a slogan on a T-shirt. It isn’t an abstract philosophy. It means get off your ass and do the thing that needs doing. Today. If it fails, it fails. If it works, it works. So what? Either way, the sooner the better.
That’s it. You have 365 days. Show me what you’ve got.
In other words, stop being so afraid and just burn down the house already!
Obviously, I’m not about to literally grab the matches. But I’ve decided that today—this bittersweet anniversary—is the best day of my life. And 2012 is my year to shine.
Make it your year to shine, too.
Filed under: Brain tumor, Friends and family, Psychology, Random thoughts, Travel | 41 Comments
Tags: Brain tumor, BrandBuilder blog, Jan, Olivier Blanchard, Skype, Todd
I was a bit reluctant to leave Paris last November, when I hopped the train to Freiburg. But I soon forgot my misgivings: I fell in love with Freiburg at first sight.
So I wasn’t too surprised this morning to find myself surfing for blogs about this beautiful German city. The first hit was something called “Iron Blogger Freiburg.” I clicked on the link, expecting to find a post about heavy-metal music, or maybe the torture devices in the Augustinermuseum. Instead, I stumbled upon a marvelous blogging project.
Iron Blogger is a group effort that requires the participants to write at least one blog post per week. Otherwise, they’ll have to chip in a “fine”. Every so often, the fines will be converted to drinks collectively.
… I like this idea and invite all bloggers in Freiburg to join Iron Blogger Freiburg!
Freiburg, blogging and beer?! Sign me up!
Alas, there was one hitch: I’m not actually *in* Germany. Not even close.
“I’m wondering whether you’d consider adding someone to your group who doesn’t currently live in Freiburg,” I wrote to Jochen, the group’s organizer, “… but who will be there in September to settle any fines she may incur.”
I was delighted to get Jochen’s response this afternoon. I’m officially a Freiburg Iron Blogger!
Fortunately (für mich und Deutschsprechers everywhere) I’m not required to post in German. Still … I’ve found my motivation to at least try, on occasion—and I’ve found my motivation to start blogging regularly again, too.
A big thanks to Jochen for setting up Iron Blogger Freiburg—and especially for being so gracious to the group’s newest (and most geographically challenged) member.
Prost !
Filed under: Attempted humor, Technology, Travel | 8 Comments
Tags: Freiburg, Freiburg Iron Blogger, Germany, Paris
The wolf you feed
Well, here we go again: It’s New Year’s Day, and millions of people have resolved to be better—and do better—in the year ahead.
I’m a big supporter of self-improvement. So if you’ve decided to lose weight or quit smoking or cut down on your drinking, I highly recommend zenhabits.com.
I’m also a big believer in the power of making small changes. Every thought and action either moves us closer to our best selves, or farther away.
In fact, I believe that our thoughts can help shape our future. What we think about, we become. And with that in mind, I offer this story (courtesy of my friend Norine):
One evening a Cherokee Elder told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said: “My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all. One is good: It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, kindness, empathy, generosity, compassion, faith and truth. The other is evil: It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, resentment, superiority, arrogance, self-pity, and lies.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf wins?”
The elder simply replied: “The one you feed.”
May 2012 bring you health, happiness, and hope.
Filed under: On this day in history, Psychology | 15 Comments
Tags: Cherokee, New year's day resolution, the wolf you feed, which wolf will you feed
A song to the stars
I awoke long before dawn today, feeling lonely and melancholic, so I went to my bookshelf in search of solace. My bookshelf doesn’t hold books, so much as cherished memories: Most of the books I own were gifts from friends.
Today I picked up Karsten Heuer’s Being Caribou, a birthday present from my dear friend Jim. (On Christmas morning, it seemed fitting to read about reindeer.) But I didn’t even reach the first page because of what lay inside the front cover.
I loved the old Christmas photo of Jim and his dogs. Jim has long since lost and mourned them, but he still has the same radiant smile.
And I chuckled at the old Far Side cartoon a colleague gave me on my last day at the Star Tribune. I’ve lost touch with Tod, but his scrawled writing brought back a flood of happy memories.
Then I found an old newspaper clipping. I vaguely remember Steve handing it to me one Christmas morning, years ago. “A song to the stars in times of darkness … There’s joy in this season, but also loss,” read the headline and lead-in.
For many — myself included — the holidays are bittersweet. This morning I thought of the loved ones I’ve lost, of my own uncertain future. I thought of the friends who have mourned children and parents this year. And I couldn’t find words more beautiful and fitting for all of us than those of Camille Gage.
Merry Christmas.
A song to the stars in times of darkness
Last Sunday was the winter solstice, the darkest day of the year. There were 8 hours and 46 minutes of sun. It was the first official day of winter, but here in the upper Midwest winter has already made itself known. As of this writing, I’ve shoveled the snow off my sidewalk three times in the past 36 hours and it’s 6 degrees below zero.
It’s midnight, the house is silent, and I’m thinking about that weightless place between joy and melancholy. The holidays always do this to me.
I’ll admit I cried three times in the past 24 hours. Once for close friends who are struggling; once for my mom, who died 27 years ago and whom I still miss every day; and once at the Pantages Theatre during the musical play “All is Calm,” about the World War I Christmas Truce of 1914.
“All is Calm” chronicles an event that took place on a battlefield in Europe on Christmas Eve. In the dark of night, under a star-filled sky, a German soldier lay down his arms, walked out of his trench, and sang “Silent Night” in the so-called No Man’s Land between the British and German encampments. Following his soulful lead, soldiers on both sides laid down their weapons for the night, sang together, exchanged modest gifts and helped to bury each other’s dead.
It was this last thought that brought the tears. I thought of the U.S. troops in Iraq and Afghanistan. Though their experience bears little resemblance to the trench warfare of the past, they still suffer the sight of wounded comrades and mourn their dead. Their sacrifice is enormous.
Loss occurs every day and everywhere, not just on the battlefield. Over the past year I’ve watched friends and family struggle to cope with life’s challenges: a child’s debilitating drug addiction, serious health problems, financial insecurity, job loss, and the death of partners and aging parents — of heart disease, cancer and suicide.
Why do we so often feel stranded in our sorrow and alone in our grief? The presence of loss and experience of pain, while intensely personal, is also extraordinarily common. It’s the tie that binds us but is too often buried beneath a silent a soul-stifling stoicism.
The Christmas Truce of 1914 brought to mind a passage from Henry David Thoreau’s book, “Walden.” Thoreau wrote, “It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look … To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts.”
This holiday season I will aim to channel the artistry of that German soldier, who walked out of the trenches and sang “Silent Night” to the stars above — who was willing to be shot at, to die — to bear witness to our shared humanity and yearning for connection.
For everyone who has lost a loved one — and that is most of us — the holidays are a bittersweet time. This year, may we step out of our individual trenches and sing together to the stars.
Filed under: Friends and family, Minnesota, On this day in history, Psychology | 8 Comments
Tags: Being Caribou, Christmas, German, grief, Jim, loss, truce, World War i
Some people call me the Don Quixote of the Latin Quarter because my head is so far up in the clouds that I can imagine all of us are angels in paradise.
George Whitman wrote those words on the chalkboard outside his bookstore on January 1, 2004.
George Whitman, who died in Paris yesterday at the age of 98, was a dreamer indeed—and an optimist, a philosopher, a lover of words and books.
But most will remember him best as the founder of Shakespeare and Company. That’s how he became a patron saint of writers and a Parisian literary legend.
I wish I’d met George Whitman. Although I spent many hours in his shop over the years, I never mustered the courage to ask, “Is George around, by chance?” It seemed presumptuous, and too much of an intrusion.
Plus, what would George Whitman—who had known Henry Miller, Anaïs Nin, Samuel Beckett, James Baldwin, Allen Ginsberg and even Ernest Hemingway—want with a fifth-string writer like me?
After reading George’s biography on the Shakespeare and Company website, I am filled with regret: We would have had plenty to discuss. (I, too, once got lost in a South American jungle.) And we could have chatted in Spanish.
After his graduation [from Boston University] in 1935 he decided to travel again. With $40 in his pocket he caught a ride to Mexico City and began a voyage that was to trace almost 5000 kilometers through Mexico and Central America, including Honduras, Guatemala, Costa Rica. During this time he became fluent in Spanish.
This trip was a formative experience in George’s life. Much of his traveling was done alone and on foot. He had many adventures and close calls. In an isolated part of the Yucatan he fell sick with dysentery and was forced to walk alone for three days through the swampy jungle with no food or water. Eventually he was found and nursed back to health by a tribe of Mayans. George was deeply impressed by the fact that despite hardship and extreme poverty, the people he met were invariably friendly and generous. This philosophy of “give what you can, take what you need” would become one of his founding principles.
And live by those founding principles he did: Above his bookstore were several rooms he let out freely to visiting writers (and at least one musician I know). Some stayed for a few days; others for weeks or even months. According to the obituary article in today’s Irish Times, by his own estimate George lodged some 40,000 people.
I was touched to read some of those people’s tributes to George on Facebook this morning.
I’m sure George had no idea how many lives he’d help shape, when he opened the first incarnation of his bookstore in 1951. (He certainly enriched mine by creating one of my favorite places on earth.)
But even the richest and most wonderful of stories must end. George’s message on the chalkboard concluded like this:
… In the year 1600 our whole building was a monastery called La Maison du Mustier. In medieval times each monastery had a frère lampier whose duty was to light the lamps at nightfall. I have been doing this for fifty years; now it is my daughter’s turn. —GW
My heartfelt condolences to George’s daughter, Sylvia Beach … and my heartfelt gratitude for carrying on her father’s light.
To read more:
A personal recollection from XpatScot
The Washington Post
The Telegraph
The Los Angeles Times
Janice Harper for The Huffington Post
Filed under: On this day in history, Paris, Photography, Writing | 5 Comments
Tags: George Whitman, Paris, Paris photography, Shakespeare & Co., Sylvia Beach, writing
Going postal
I was so proud of myself when I filled out the customs form. “Total value of imported goods: $120.” It’s true that I’d bought a cashmere sweater in Paris ($100 value), and a book ($20 value).
But—thanks to a customs loophole—there was no need to declare the tuna ($30 value), the Ariel detergent ($30 value), the chocolates ($60 value), or the salad dressing ($10 value) I’d mailed home.
Alas, my genius plan had one small flaw: The cap on the salad dressing was apparently not designed to actually contain the product. So when I went to pick up my package at the post office last night, the clerk said “I’m so sorry” as he handed me a moist, moldy box.
It’s never good to see your contraband wrapped in haz-mat plastic.
I felt like I was doing an alien autopsy as I gingerly removed the contents one by one.
I was relieved that my wide-angle converter lens had been spared a creamy, garlic-and-chives demise.
And I was amused to see that some of the unneeded tampons I’d tossed in the box had done their super-absorbent best to sop up the spill.
In the end, I was able to salvage the tuna, the bath gel, and much of the detergent I’d bought for my friend Laurice. The three boxes of mini-chocolates from Maxim’s, however, were a loss. Sigh.
I’m disappointed, but I’ve learned an important lesson: Next time, I’ll seal the salad dressing lid with tape. And then I’ll send it home in Steve’s luggage.
Just kidding, honey …
By the way: In spite of my mishap with this shipment, I highly recommend the French postal service. For €42 you can mail home as much as you can fit in one of these extra-large Colissimo boxes, up to a total of 7 kg., and it usually arrives within about a week. It’s a great way to send home a big ol’ pile of souvenirs without having to schlepp an extra suitcase.
Filed under: Attempted humor, Paris, Travel | 17 Comments
Tags: Ariel, Colissimo, Colissiomo, customs, Laurice, Paris, Paris post office, postal fail, souvernirs
Where in the world?!
